I hate saying goodbye :'(

It's so sad and I teared up again. I think I hate saying goodbye more
than anything especially when you don't know when and if youre going
to see the person again.

Jenny's mum was like it's fine, we'll see you again at easter. One can
always hope...

Boarding soon. I have 15 hours infront of me. Joy. I'm really going to
miss tjis place and everyone here!

The US Hola! como estas?

We went to church this morning. The last time I went there some old woman hit me so I was less than excited... Anyways first it was a normal cermon but then they had some sort of prayer meeting. So I sat there quite, starring at my feet for a freaking hour. Not fun. We were supposed to pray outlout but nonono. I don't pray and I really don't pray aloud.

After that there was a lunch at church. While we were sitting jusby the line to the food so everyone passed by us. And it kept coming up people asking if I was emma from Sweden. Awkward? Yes! Then this woman came up talking to us and she was like hey! So I just hey-ed back. And Jenny said that I was from Sweden and she went "Hola". Hahah. She was super serious and we were like that's spanish and she just went oh. Como estas ^^ And then she was like how do you say hey in Swedish, and she was quite embarrassed. Haha It was so funny. It came up so many people talking and asked questions and stuff. Jenny's old history teacher came up and started talking, and asked questions like what my parents do and what grades I have. Really random questions. However, it seems like everyone here has some kind of connection to Sweden. Ancestors, family who lives there etc.

Right now Jenny is taking her nap xD And I was working on my psychology paper but i couldn't concentrate so I started working on my English paper. somehow I ended up here... I better get back to it. I don't even know when it is due :S

Sorry for the spelling.

The trip to the US

The trip went really good. All though I had a really bad start it ended good. I forgot my cellphone in the jacket which my mum brought with her. I desperatly asked a man if I could borrow his cellphone, and i called my mum. She doesn't answer, so I run out of the security trying to catch her. Then I hear a message saying that I should go ot the information and I'm like: where the hell is the information? Anyways I found her so I got my phone back. The second really bad thing was that i lost my baggage recipt. Freaking freat, and I paniced because I'd need it in Frankfurt when I' d get my boarding cards to the US. But that worked out too since the number of the bag was on the boarding card to Frankfurt. In Frankfurt I have a hard time finding US airways's disk, and when I find it they ask a bunch of questions which they didn't ask the last them. Then the woman goes I just have to check with my superviser. Bullshit. But everything was fine.

The rest of the trip was fine. I watch all the tv shows, that I didn't watch this past week, in Philly. I was so tired by then. I got to Erie and Jenny was there on time this time, and so was my luggage =)

I arrived at 22.30 so we didn't do much besides talking. We started to talk about the svine flu vaccine, and they get it up their nose... (!)(?)

I basically fell asleep as soon as I got to bed. And it felt so good sleeping after being up for so long.

Anywhere but here.

I am leaving in 20 min =) Of course there might be a slight problem getting in to the US, I mean with my luck there will be a problem. I'll just pray, and beg really hard and maybe it will work itself out.

TTYL

Suddenly it isn't what it used to be

She feels lost in her own life
Treading water just to keep from slipping under
And she wonders if she's where she's supposed to be
Tired of trying to do it right
Her dreams are just too far away.

I'm going to do something real sutpid, real soon.

I wish I could press rewind

I am buried in homework. Well, I guess it isn't really homework, but it is work which I have to do at home or in the US. I think I'd rather do it at home and not waste my time there on HW.

Yesterday Julia stayed here and we worked LAAATE. We finished our economy project and also worked on our project work: Diadem by JCE and designed a logo.

I woke up tired today, I was tired, tired and more tired. I couldn't speak. I was unable to for sentences.. hah it's true or if I managed to say a sentence it was incorrect xD

French was fun, as always. all though pronouncing the words are not fun. Now I'm going to finish the next chapter for French, then I'm going to finish my geography hw, and last but definitely not the least: read the Swedish B handout for the 5 hour long national test tomorrow. No breaks, 5 hours of Swedish, sound's like loads of fun.

TTYL

I know that you see what you're doing to me

The day is getting closer and closer: the days where I break. The day where I don't want to do the homework anymore. The days where I will not go to school The day when I can't get out of bed. and it is all because of you.

I also know this sounds silly. I never talk about my feelings, not really. I never let anyone in, no one knows. I have learned the hard way that it is impossible to really trust people, and I have been proven right time after time. But no one knows.

Today is just one of those days where everything is fucked up. And a day where you don't want to get on my bad side. Today is still a day where I do care about school work, and you should only dare to mess with my assignments and MY grades.

I just want to scream, and run far far far away! Thank God I'm leaving on Friday. I am so sick of this place. There are no words to explain. Tomorrow is going to break me for sure, and then I will be back to this summer.

Icing over a secret pain

Blaaah. I just hate certain days. The days when I want to be anywhere but here. Just want to get out of here. It is just so annoying, and I don't know what to do. I means 24 hours? It is enough with afternoons-night. But not 24/7. It is hard enough as it is. And all this talk about this and that, me getting a job. Hello?! A injured knee it is not so fucking easy working with that especially when I barely can walk on it sometimes. Fuck you!

No I don't believe you

Yesterday I felt like crap in school. I seriously thoguht that I was going to throw up. In Swedish we were preparing our self for the National Test, well every one except from me who was lying dead on my table. But it felt better after lunch, and I when I got home I took a power nap then it basically disappeared.

I met up my cousin, or actually she came her and her dad drove us to the cinema. We watched G-Force and it was hilarious^^ I may have been because I was really tired but I laughed more than she did. Then we just hung out, playing board games, watched Hannah Monatan and stuff.. Oh, and I fell asleep before she did ^^ And then she woke me up, but it took 5 minutes for her to wake me up. I must have been exhausted.

Today I went with her to her handball practice. I could feel the hate in there :p No not realyl but it was weird being there. I'm glad I quick that club. They even have to pay for the handballs they use, and they aren't really a real team yet ... weird.

Then I went to Kunskap-och framtid mässan, and got some info on Swedish Universites. Handels in Gothenburg & Handels in Jönköping sounds interesting. Unfortunately I do not want to live in Jönköping... But the school seems good. But since I really want to go to Handels here, I don't have a back up which kind suck, but I am a bit interested in a working holiday in Australia. We'll see, we'll see...

I was supposed to write me literary essay on Things fall a part, but then I realized that I have to read the book again because I have no fucking idea of what it really is about except for on the surface. And yes, it is really hard to write a literary essay on a book where you only understand the surface. Lucky for me a have a 20 hour trip on Friday, so I'll find time to read then. Instead of writing on my english paper, I'm gonna start on my Psychology paper. I just have to repeat how much I HATE group work..!